All-star point guard, master handle-haver, and epic layup-finisher Kyrie Irving sent shockwaves through the NBA last week when he demanded a trade from the Cleveland Cavaliers. Sources close to the young Uncle Drew state that he felt his time in Lebron's shadow was over and that he would prefer to be traded to the far side of the earth where there are no shadows as there is no sun and basketball is played in a state of permanent midnight. Kyrie has gone as far as stating his preference to play for the Bizarro-Spurs, The New York SkcinK, or The Miami Cold. The exact process of how a transaction between the NBA and the WNBA would work is not clear, but some precedent may exist in the trade that brought Sam Cassell from his alien home world to the Los Angeles Clippers. While the details of this groundbreaking move are still being worked out, fans and analysts alike can’t help but salivate with excitement over the possibilities. We reached out to the other side, and the only response we got was from the always affable and approachable Bizarro Popovich:
“Come
Kyrie, come now to the far side where your powers will be honed in the
darkness, unleashing a thousand years of team basketball.” ~Bizarro Pop
Bizarro
Pop’s counterpart on this side of Earth has already done his part to facilitate
the move by performing the rites of ritual sacrifice on Lamarcus Aldridge.
Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless.
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