Raiders to Make Playoffs: Its Gauransheeded

Richard Seymour has guaranteed that the 2 and 4 and categorically horrible at football raiders will make the playoffs. "You can mark it down. The Raiders will be in the playoffs in 2009," Seymour said in a radio interview. Haha playoffs. The Raiders defense is definitely pretty good, and they showed that they can handle a very tough to defend team like the Eagles. But there is so so much left to be desired on offense. Jamarcus has so far been a huge bust and the Raiders essentially can't move the ball at all. Let's assume that the respective division titles go to New England, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis, and Denver (oh hey!). So two wild-card spots for Mr. Seymour and crew....I'm gonna go ahead and say that the Bengals and the Ravens are better then the Raiders and probably the Dolphins, Jaguars, Texans, and Chargers are too. I dunno, somehow if you squint and look at it from just the right angle you can almost imagine it....but not really. FAIL.




"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

I Guess I Would Be OK With This . . .

. . .for two reasons. First, CC Sabathia vs. Cliff Lee. The 2007 Cy vs. the 2008 Cy. One squandered Cleveland Indians talent vs. Another squandered Cleveland Indians talent. Hefty Lefty vs. Slim Southpaw. And I think that Hamels vs. Burnett would also be a nice bout now that Cole is off of maternity leave. Second, I have a hard time pulling for the Yankees because of the whole monster payroll thing. But I also have a hard time pulling for the defending champs in anything, just because I like to see success spread around. So I'd be good with this, and provided that southern California baseball doesn't stage any Soxish comebacks, I think it'll be a fun classic.

Shockwaves Through the D

The 2003, 2006, and 2008 WNBA champion Detroit Shock are leaving the D for Tulsa, Oklahoma (looked it up, it's a real place). What the hell? The Lions have the worst season ever, the Pistons have their worst season in years, the Tigers slip up and drop a 3 game lead with 4 to play, and the Red Wings lose in game 7 of the cup finals...and now this? The D cannot suffer another blow...I guess now I know what it felt like for Sonics fans when they lost their team to Oklahoma City.







"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

Mike Sims-Walker: GET SOME!

If you were one of the many who started either David Garrard or Mike Sims-Walker in your fantasy football league last week, you were no doubt disappointed when Sims-Walker was deactivated right before the game and the Jags potent passing attack was squandered 41-0 in what was supposed to be a juicy match up against Seattle. I for one played Garrard as my carefully selected bye-week QB and when nothing happened I blamed Sims-Walker for his "rule violation" that deactivated him. "What an Idiot" I remember thinking...stupid wide receiver divas. Well I take it back Mr. Sims-Walker, you are excused. As it turns out the Jags receiver was deactivated because he did not make bed check, specifically because he was having "relations" with a ladyfriend and these "relations" went on for longer than anticipated. Sometimes its hard to time that shit...play on my man!




"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

ALCS: Angels and Demons

Let's face it, this is a a gross match up and no one likes either of these teams. Unless one of these teams get extremely hot this will go to the wire, meaning that we will have to see a lot of this series or watch regular season hockey. As usual the Yanks have a devastating line-up, but this year they are also hitting some balls in October (Oh hey A-Rod way to play baseball). But it would be a stretch to say the bats are an advantage for the Yanks as the Angels (of ANAHEIM!) had 10 guys with a 100 hits. 10 dudes! They can obviously swing with anyone including the Yanks. The Angels also have a deeper starting rotation and can rely on five pitchers when they only need four to pitch out the LCS. Girardi is meanwhile talking about keeping Joba in the pen and reducing their staff to three guys: CC, Burnett, and Pettite which I suppose gets around the problem of not having a 4th pitcher...but can you really get 3 dominant starts out of CC in one LCS? I don't know, his problem in the postseasons past has been arm fatigue and that can bite the yanks if this goes the distance. And there is no reason why it shouldn't the Yanks and Angels split the regular season 5/5 and we can only assume the trend will continue. Of course the Yankees could go crazy and just knock everything out of their tiny park and end this thing in 5, but I see it a long series in which the Angels rotation will protect a patient and efficient offense. Texeira went the wrong way, Angels in 7.

"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

NLCS: Doyers and Philleeez Meng

Phillies and Dodgers open up the NLCS tommorow in Mannywood at 8:00 pm. Phillies are a shade off of their postseason brilliance from last year and the Dodgers have had it together for most of the season. Still this series is hard to call. Dodgers have a better end to end offensive lineup no doubt, but the the Philies' core lineup with Victirino, Utley Howard, and Werth is ridiculous. No offense to the Dodger rotation who seemed to able to handle the Cards offense (admitedly I thought they wouldn't be able to) but the Dodger's lack of a real "Ace" will probably be exposed more than once against that core of their lineup. The Phillies bullpen (spotlight on Brad Lidge) has in no way been its dominant self and the Dodgers should be able to rely on their guys to close games without a problem. Obvious advantage Dodgers, but which version of Manny will show up in the bottom of the 8th and 9th innings and how often will Manny's wild bunch be playing with the lead? Another swing factor here is Cole Hammels, if he pitches like Cole Hammels 2008 then the series is very different. The Philies are strong on the road and a strong game (7 innings and a 3 run lead - type of outing) from Hammels could put a heavy slant on the series, assuming Philadelphia will also win the Cliff Lee start. Dodgers however put the bats on at home and could easily rough up Hamels, especially if he pitches like he did against the Cards. What's going to give? Hamels of course had a child coming into the world against the Cards and went straight to the hospital when he was pulled. Assuming he has calmed down a bit he could easily come out slinging in LA, the same place where he secured a trip to the series for the Philies in 08. Prediction? No revenge for the Doyers this year, a closer series than 08 but Philies in 6.

"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

The Heir Apparent

24-year old Anthony Kim has been an exciting addition to professional golf, and has given the American Presidents Cup team a fresh new face. While some supporters are crossing their fingers that Kim will be the second coming of Tiger Woods, Aussie golfer Robert Allenby has given Kim another title: the second coming of John "I have no idea what day it is" Daly. According to Allenby, Kim was out partying until 4am during the Presidents Cup, and came home "sideways," only to get up the next morning and shoot a 6 under. "Ask his playing partners," said Allenby, "he is the loosest cannon in that team." Kim has denied Allenby's claim, saying that he hopes it is a joke. It should be noted that Kim beat the tar out of Allenby on the course. If Kim is in fact developing a substance abuse problem, it's sad, and it will be sad if a problem like that sabotages his career as much as substance abuse seems to have hit Daly's career. But Robert Allenby needs to shut his mouth. If Tiger or even Mickelson were to come out and tell Kim that he needs to address this problem--if it is a problem, that would be one thing. This seems more like a sour grapes pissant taking a low blow at a young, popular golfer.

Michael Crabtree: 2 Legit 2 Quit

Michael Crabtree finally signed a 6-year deal last week ending the hullabaloo surrounding his holdout. Rumor has it that Crabtree signed because he realized that Dez Bryant would be drafted ahead of him anyway so he would be unlikely to get the top receiver money he was looking for next year. But in reality Crabtree probably signed because he was following the sage advice of his confidant and mentor: MC HAMMER! That's right Mr. Hammer was present at the signing of the contract, presumably due to his responsible financial perspective and respected status in the media. BAM! In truth Hammer is friend's with Crabtree Mentor Deion Sanders as well as his agent. Way to keep good company. Let's just all admit up front that if Crabtree used Tony Dungy as his mentor he would have had a contract from birth guaranteed for a 1,000 years. DUNGY WILL NOT BE DENIED!!!!



"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."

Francisco Garcia: The Incident With The Balls

Francisco Garcia, G-F Sacramento Kings, has broken his arm weight lifting while laying on an inflatable exercise ball. The ball obviously burst thereby breaking the arm of the unsuspecting Garcia (ironically pictured here getting Yao'd in the balls). Kings owner Joe Maloof, never one to sleep on the job, has sent an email to the entire NBA to spread the word. He has called this balls tragedy a "wake-up call" and has vowed not to let this happen to other teams and franchises..."...any of these teams that use these balls, I want to make sure they know what happened to us." All balls have been removed from the Sacramento King's locker room.






"Both teams played hard...goodnight and godbless."